Lifelong user behavior sequences, comprising up to tens of thousands of history behaviors, are crucial for capturing user interests and predicting user responses in modern recommendation systems. A two-stage paradigm is typically adopted to handle these long sequences: a few relevant behaviors are first searched from the original long sequences via an attention mechanism in the first stage and then aggregated with the target item to construct a discriminative representation for prediction in the second stage. In this work, we identify and characterize, for the first time, a neglected deficiency in existing long-sequence recommendation models: a single set of embeddings struggles with learning both attention and representation, leading to interference between these two processes. Initial attempts to address this issue using linear projections -- a technique borrowed from language processing -- proved ineffective, shedding light on the unique challenges of recommendation models. To overcome this, we propose the Decoupled Attention and Representation Embeddings (DARE) model, where two distinct embedding tables are initialized and learned separately to fully decouple attention and representation. Extensive experiments and analysis demonstrate that DARE provides more accurate search of correlated behaviors and outperforms baselines with AUC gains up to 0.9% on public datasets and notable online system improvements. Furthermore, decoupling embedding spaces allows us to reduce the attention embedding dimension and accelerate the search procedure by 50% without significant performance impact, enabling more efficient, high-performance online serving.