By employing powerful edge servers for data processing, mobile edge computing (MEC) has been recognized as a promising technology to support emerging computation-intensive applications. Besides, non-orthogonal multiple access (NOMA)-aided MEC system can further enhance the spectral-efficiency with massive tasks offloading. However, with more dynamic devices brought online and the uncontrollable stochastic channel environment, it is even desirable to deploy appealing technique, i.e., intelligent reflecting surfaces (IRS), in the MEC system to flexibly tune the communication environment and improve the system energy efficiency. In this paper, we investigate the joint offloading, communication and computation resource allocation for IRS-assisted NOMA MEC system. We firstly formulate a mixed integer energy efficiency maximization problem with system queue stability constraint. We then propose the Lyapunov-function-based Mixed Integer Deep Deterministic Policy Gradient (LMIDDPG) algorithm which is based on the centralized reinforcement learning (RL) framework. To be specific, we design the mixed integer action space mapping which contains both continuous mapping and integer mapping. Moreover, the award function is defined as the upper-bound of the Lyapunov drift-plus-penalty function. To enable end devices (EDs) to choose actions independently at the execution stage, we further propose the Heterogeneous Multi-agent LMIDDPG (HMA-LMIDDPG) algorithm based on distributed RL framework with homogeneous EDs and heterogeneous base station (BS) as heterogeneous multi-agent. Numerical results show that our proposed algorithms can achieve superior energy efficiency performance to the benchmark algorithms while maintaining the queue stability. Specially, the distributed structure HMA-LMIDDPG can acquire more energy efficiency gain than centralized structure LMIDDPG.