We present Blitzkriging, a new approach to fast inference for Gaussian processes, applicable to regression, optimisation and classification. State-of-the-art (stochastic) inference for Gaussian processes on very large datasets scales cubically in the number of 'inducing inputs', variables introduced to factorise the model. Blitzkriging shares state-of-the-art scaling with data, but reduces the scaling in the number of inducing points to approximately linear. Further, in contrast to other methods, Blitzkriging: does not force the data to conform to any particular structure (including grid-like); reduces reliance on error-prone optimisation of inducing point locations; and is able to learn rich (covariance) structure from the data. We demonstrate the benefits of our approach on real data in regression, time-series prediction and signal-interpolation experiments.